If anything is quite transparent these days, it's that our society needs help. We can all agree that the past five years have stirred up something deep within us. Rattled us independently, and collectively as a society. We're scrambling, trying to lead functional lives. Most of us are confused with what to do or where to start. We see it every time we step onto the pavement of our hometown. People are scared, angry, and confused. The unholy triad of feelings that spawn harm and mayhem wherever they creep. It's hard to deny it. If you're not currently observing it unfold in front of your eyes, you can sense it.
The general emergency here is that we need help, and we're desperately trying to fill it with what's being handed to us. Instant gratification via multiple facets: quick and conveniently packaged poison we call food, get-rich-quick scams, diet fads, video shorts... You get the idea. So, how do we get the right form of help? "Ask and you shall receive" right? We can't be silent about something we need, and expect it to come to us. Even as babies we know that, but don't hop onto the fussy bus too quickly. No. We do, however, deserve to have our true inner-self speak out and be heard. Respectively, we should learn the healthy practices of said freedom. By carrying it out in a manner of doing no harm, either to yourself or to others. This approach not only helps you, but your fellow humans can reap some inspiring benefits as well.
If you're an individual fighting to be heard and unsure how to find a welcoming ear. Or you want to step out of the cold isolation and into the warm embrace of knowing that you're going to be okay. You are not alone, and there are ways you can get what you need. There's even simple things in your grasp at any given moment that could help.
In fact, many of us were already trying to cope, overcome, or heal from trauma before the dreaded lockdown. Let's call it like it is; a curse. A curse on our beautifully dynamic and potentially progressive land. It was suspiciously brilliant timing to throw us off kilter and into an unknown territory accompanied by confusion and pain. The "better days ahead" we had been promised were swept out from under us. Forcing us to stay in our plastic opaque bubbles. When allowed, we could traverse the terrain in our face masks with six-foot barriers. This in long-term... is just not sustainable for a healthy lifestyle. Thank goodness for the internet and social media though! Can't go wrong with that, right?
Let's see... Do you have boundaries or healthy habits between the screen and the keyboard? The individual answers vary, but it's important to illuminate the big picture of this popular art form we call social media. The authenticity and oversharing were still exciting and in full swing in 2020, but it quickly twisted into the ugly exposure we recognize today. We put everything out there, perfectly critiqued photos and empty threats galore. Comparing and competing with one another, desperately reaching for those approvals that flood our brains with good feeling chemicals, sailing us off to detrimental land. It's okay, we've all done it. The beauty in this, the silver lining most people don't see, is we can take our experiences and pluck out those healthy life lessons, and tuck them into our wisdom pocket for safekeeping.
By the time the curse had been lifted and we could resurface, we were too accustomed to how we communicated on the screen. In contrast; face to face, or in this case, mask to mask, social situations morphed into a conundrum dressed as Pennywise the scary clown itself. Some continued to stay in their safe space (in their head), some retreated into said space for the first time and found it to be even more disturbing, and some went to extremes of speaking out or lashing out. Much like the web allowed them to. Either way, our true selves and our voices were being ignored. Now that the quarantine is in the past, we too can lift ourselves out of the heavy deception and pain.
And if you were like me five years ago... you had been silent and unsatiated by society's demands and ideals for too long. Considering the many resources we have available to help us, we tend to ignore the most reliable, sustainable, and obtainable ones. For instance, healthy communication and expression.
It's often that I see someone completely let the heaviness of their thoughts sink deeper into the abyss. Lips tightly pressed for a second while they justify the withholding in their head, all before shifting attention back to the conversation. There are too many of us stuck in an endless cycle of doing what we think we should, what others expect from us, and what is demanded of us to survive. This is not what we're here for. We're here to help and support each other, to love, encourage, lift each other up, and succeed. Things we all need as we journey through this thing called life. Living as a human with basic needs on top of societal demands is hard enough. Let's not do it alone.
Some of you have brilliant thoughts, ideas, and realizations, but they swiftly get tucked away in a corner of your mind. Either you've been conditioned to do so, the wrong words may roll off your tongue instead, or you're not sure how to express it without the fear of negative responses, even the dreaded silence for that matter. There can be many reasons that cause us to refrain or convey a message. With help, very few can stop us from making a significant change in the right direction.
On a side note: You should know that the silent response, or lack thereof, can be a nugget of conversational gold if you can spot it.
Either way, you have a voice! You have morals, standards, boundaries, desires, goals, ideas, opinions, etc. They're all there waiting for the spotlight! And I'm going to help you find them and cultivate them into your life, while we work towards your much needed and desired lifestyle.
First things first. The takeaways here:
1. We've all had the rug pulled from under us, and we're scrambling for something to hold on to. We're in this together, and there's a way to cope and overcome. When we realize this, we can work towards finding peace in the chaos.
2. Everyone goes through struggles, pains, and confusion. There is no competition here. Although our experiences and events vastly vary between individuals, we find commonality and connection through the one thing we can always relate to; emotions.
3. Our bad, even awful experiences teach us something beneficial. Whether you learn something about yourself or have gained a new perception of the world around you, pain will always be accompanied by a privilege. It is normal to not see it under your nose when you're chin-deep, trust in the process, you will see it when you're ready.
4. There are always going to be Band-Aid solutions available to you, some more cunning and alluring than others. While they may provide a brief distraction and feelings of hopefulness, they will not make the problem go away, (they don't disappear like we'd hope them to).
5. We can't continue to avoid our mental injuries and struggles, it's not sustainable and it hinders growth. Given, that everyone is entitled to some time. Just don't put it off for too long, you will know when you're ready to move forward.
6. The issues we set aside will eventually need: recognition and validation, to be cared for, and to have the healing process begin.
7. Somewhere in that process, or possibly further down the road, we come to a promising realization. We learn how far we've come. The knowledge and wisdom we've obtained, how much we've grown, and what we're capable of conquering.
8. We see that there's so much room for growth, and we can get excited about moving forward in life.
9. Everything you desire and want in life is obtainable. You have it in you to be happy. That voice of reason, the stability you're looking for, you'll find within yourself. With some guidance and support, you can get back on your feet and move in the right direction.
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